"You've Changed, Miss Morgan."

This is going to sound hokey and cheesy and completely out of character for me, but I feel like my fellow writers might relate.

Last night, I dreamed of a muse.

Not just any muse.  A character from a very popular film series that used to be a huge part of my life.  A character I've written in old fanfictions and played on old RP boards.

He was in my dream, came to me as if we hadn't seen each other in years.  He called me Genesis, the name of one of my characters who has been hibernating in my imagination for years, a character that has always been an extension of myself as well as a role model for who I wish I was.

There was an adventure to be had.  We were in an old building, perhaps an old train station or museum, huge, filled with statues.  Something was coming.  Something epic and frightening.  He was ready for the battle.  I hesitated.  I tried to logic my way out of it, avoid the adventure.

He looked at me, as if seeing me for the first time, and not liking what he saw.

"You've changed, Miss Morgan," he said.

It hit me.  Both me in my dream and me now in consciousness.  

You've changed, Miss Morgan.

I have changed.  I've become cynical and safe.  I've avoided the adventure.  I've put aside my passions and my escape and my happy place.  That tattoo on my wrist, of the wolf howling at the moon?  That's Genesis.  Genesis is strong and fearless and passionate and everything I want to be.

I want to be her again.

As I sit down to write, beginning perhaps too late my novel for NaNo, I'll look at my tattoo and remember how brave Genesis is, and how brave I can be, too.

In a recent Court of Nerds​ interview, comic writer Sam Humphries said something that really resonated with me as a writer: "If I don't write these stories, no one will."

My future isn't the only one being held back.  My stories are, too, and everyone in them.  Genesis, HellKat, Lucia, all of these wonderful, complex characters with dreams and loves and stories to tell will die with me if I don't do them justice and send them out to the world.

In my dream, when he told me I changed, I looked at his face, one my Genesis was so familiar with, and took his hand.  He grinned, and we ran off to adventure.

Don't worry, Captain.  I haven't changed so much.

The Grand Rapids Comic Con GPOY Giveaway!

The Grand Rapids Comic Con GPOY Giveaway!

I'll be attending the Grand Rapids Comic Con all day on Saturday and Sunday, October 17 and 18.  In order to pepper social media with epic selfies of myself with my followers and fans of both this blog and Court of Nerds, I'm holding a giveaway!  And it's STUPID easy to enter!

If you see me at GR Comic Con, flag me down and take a photo with me.  I'll be dressed as Raphael from TMNT on Saturday (look for a red bandana, sais, and a shitty attitude) and Black Canary on Sunday.  I respond to "Emily," "Emerie," "Geektoria," or "HEY LOOK IT'S STEPHEN AMELL/A NINJA TURTLE/SOMETHING SHINY."

Then, just post it on social media and tag me in it, and you're entered!

What's the prize?

A custom piece of art by yours truly!  Want a sketch or colored image of your favorite character, or even an original character?  I got you.  Want a painting for your mantle?  ALL OVER IT.  Want me to make you a custom friggin' mermaid crown?  WHATEVER BRAH, I GOT YOU.

What's the catch?  Well, I do ask that you do me a favor and follow me somewhere.  Follow my main blog, my Tumblr, my Twitter, my Instagram, or like my page on Facebook!  I'll even be super awesome and give you an entry in the contest for every social media outlet that you post the photo to and tag me in!  Why?  Because I'm self-centered.  And I like your face with my face.

You have until Monday, October 19th at midnight EST to enter, so let's see those mugs, poodles!

Em Watches Movies: Braveheart

Cristina:  WHERE DID HE PULL THAT FLAIL OUT OF?

Em:  MUFASA'S BACK, BITCHES.

Cristina:  This guy is the smartest one in the whole place.  *English soldier surrenders*  "Nope.  I don't get paid enough for this."

Sarah:  Everyone he loves dies.  He should get that checked out.

Em:  Hamish's dad is my Patronus.

Cristina:  HE'S BATSHIT CRAZY AND I LOVE IT.

Em:  All mullets, all the time.

Cristina:  We haven't seen sunlight this entire movie.  It's always raining or overcast.

Em:  The Scottish don't actually know that the sun exists.

Em:  Guys, I wanna try woad.

Em:  OH.  DON'T CRY, PRECIOUS SHORTBREAD.

Sarah:  *mistakes Scotland for Ireland*

Em:  HOW DARE YOU.

Court of Nerds Podcast

So, my preciousest poodles at the Court of Nerds asked me to come in for an interview, and obviously, I was happy to oblige.  Nothing I like more than being a nerd amongst other nerds talking about nerdy things!  We talk cosplay, conventions, and, naturally, spend a ridiculous amount of time discussing TMNT.

If you're not already doing so, you should totes keep up on these guys, because they're hilarious; easily one of my fave podcasts.  Follow them on Facebook and Twitter!

Live Blog: Mortal Kombat

Em:  After [1979's Mad Max] this will actually seem quality.

Cristina:  Liu Kang's hair is.  SO.  BEAUTIFUL.

Em:  Seriously though, if you guys ever want to see me rage in public, play the Mortal Kombat theme.

Sarah:  Why are his nipples way down there?

Em:  HOW DO YOU NOTICE THE NIPPLES WITH THAT MAGNIFICENT MANE?

Cristina: Is it bad that I find Kano attractive?

Em:  I mean, would I climb him like a tree?  Yes.

Cristina:  I wonder if he grew out his hair in rebellion.

Em:  TAKE THAT, BUDDHISM.

Sarah:  [paraphrased slightly]  His beautiful hair is compensating for his tiny dick and bottom-nipples.

Sarah:  Anyway, Zelda sex dungeon.

Cristina:  So....evil Asian and good white guy?  Hm.

Em:  Oooh, Raiden's using his Batman voice.

Sarah:  GET THAT MAN A RICOLA.

Cristina:  You're kind of a bitch, Sonya.

Sarah:  But she's a pragmatic bitch.

Cristina:  How are they so underwhelmed by all of this?!

Em:  I wanna see Cristina in one of these movies just to see her going "WHAT.  WHAT."

Cristina:  "WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON.  THIS IS JUST ONE BIG PILE OF NOPE.  GIVE ME A TABLE SO I CAN CHUCK IT AT THIS THING."

Em:  GOD DAMMIT, JOHNNY CAGE.

Cristina and Sarah:  YOU ARE USELESS.

Sarah:  They're so oiled!

Cristina:  That's how I like my men.

Sarah:  Oiled and hooded?

Em:  SUBZERO.  YEAH.  GET HIM.  POPSICLE, MOTHERFUCKER.

Goro:  "You know nothing."

Sarah and Cristina:  JON SNOW.

Sarah:  All ninjas are warriors, but not all warriors are ninjas.  It's like squares and reptiles.

Em:  WHAT?  WHAT JUST HAPPENED?

Sarah:  He should get that looked at.

Em:  He dead.

Em, pretty much whenever Scorpion came on screen:  YAAAAAAAAASSSSSS.

Cristina:  That's how I'm going to enter every room now: dramatic cartwheel.

Sarah:  How long until Michael Bay does a remake of this?

Cristina:  So, did the bad guys take the time to tease her hair while chaining her up?

Overly Enthusiastic History Lesson: Jeanne de Clisson

ALL RIGHT, FOOLS, SIT DOWN AND SHUT YOUR PIEHOLES BECAUSE I'M GONNA LEARN YOU A THING ABOUT REVENGE AND GENERAL BADASSERY.

Once upon a time in Brittany, France, there was a noblewoman named Jeanne de Clisson.  Her husband, Olivier, was way up there in both political and military rank.  During one of the approximately 1.3 trillion my-dick-is-bigger tiffs between the French and English, France apparently decided that since Olivier Clisson survived a particular attack, that must mean he didn't fight hard enough and he was thus a traitor.  So, what do you do with a war survivor?

YOU KILL HIM, BECAUSE LOGIC.

Not only was he executed with very little evidence of actual treason, but his body was left out for the world to see, something that was unheard of for nobility.

Naturally, his widow was a bit upset.

And by upset, I mean RAIN DOWN SOME MAJOR TERROR ON OL' FRANCEY-PANTS BECAUSE YOU DON'T FUCK WITH JEANNE DE CLISSON'S FAMILY, SON.

As many grieving widows do, Jeanne sold everything she and her husband owned and BOUGHT THREE BIG-ASS WARSHIPS FROM THE ENGLISH (SUCK IT, FRANCE), PAINTED THEM BLACK, DYED THE SAILS BLOOD RED, AND BECAME THE ULTIMATE VENGEFUL PIRATE QUEEN.

Jeanne's fleet terrorized the English Channel, taking down French vessels and always leaving one or two survivors to run back to France (hopefully in nothing but their underwear because that seems like Jeanne's style) to tell ol' King Parfait that shit got real.  Her favorite hobbies were pillaging the villages along Normandy's coast, supplying the English with basically whatever they wanted, cutting the heads off French aristocrats, and husband-collecting.

HER NICKNAME WAS THE LIONESS OF BRITTANY, BRUH, SHE WASN'T ONE TO FUCK WITH, OKAY.

Jeanne's story ends in the most fan-fucking-tastic way, too.  When she got too old for first-hand slaughtering (or maybe France ran out of nobles to decapitate, who even knows), she found husband numero trois, an Englishman no less, and decided to retire.  IN FRANCE, THE SAME EFFING COUNTRY SHE JUST MADE HER BITCH FOR THE PAST DECADE, BECAUSE WHEN YOU'RE THE GODDAMN LIONESS OF BRITTANY YOU DO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT..

So, the moral of this moment in history: Don't execute someone when their wife is rich and fucking terrifying.

LEVEL UP!: Emerie's Project

Emerie's Project

DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNN.

So, all that big talk, time to put my money where my mouth is and show you my personal Level Up! Project!

Please, take this example with a grain of salt.  This was tailored for me, by me, based on my current abilities and challenges and goals.  Yours might be different.  Maybe you can already run a mile without stopping.  Maybe you're struggling with a quarter mile.  Maybe you don't give a rat's ass about maintaining a nice pedicure like I do.  Maybe your idea of relaxing is going out and being social (mine is holing up in my room with Netflix).  EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT, AND THUS EVERYONE'S PROJECT WILL ALSO BE DIFFERENT.  That's the beauty of this project, it's about becoming the best YOU, not the best somebody else!

Note: The goals directly under the header of each category are my overall, big goals...they're long-term, and thus get more EXP.

So, without further ado...

Strength

Complete a 5k --- 5 EXP

Complete a 10k --- 10 EXP

Participate in the Warrior Dash --- 5 EXP

Do 50 consecutive unmodified push-ups --- 5 EXP

Get ripped enough to cosplay as Lara Croft from Tomb Raider Legend --- 20 EXP

Cardiovascular

Run a mile without stopping --- 2.0 EXP

Walk/Run/Bike five miles in one week --- 1.0 EXP

Thirty-minute dance workout --- 1.0 EXP

Strength
Twenty modified push-ups --- 0.5 EXP
Twenty unmodified push-ups --- 1.0 EXP
Fifty crunches --- 0.5 EXP
Ten pull-ups --- 1.0 EXP
Twenty squats/lunges --- 1.0 EXP
Be able to do ten reps of my own body weight (arms) --- 2.0

Combination
DVD workout --- 0,5 EXP
Thirty Day Shred Level 1 (no stopping) --- 1.0 EXP
Thirty Day Shred Level 2 (no stopping) --- 2.0 EXP
Thirty Day Shred Level 3 (no stopping) --- 3.0 EXP
Complete Insanity --- 3.0 EXP

Dexterity

Headstand for one minute --- 5 EXP

Handstand for one minute --- 10 EXP

Left leg splits --- 5 EXP

Right leg splits --- 10 EXP

Full leg-extension --- 5 EXP
Center splits --- 15 EXP

Flexibility

Stretch with workout --- 0.5 EXP
Twenty minute stretching session --- 1.0 EXP

Balance
Ballet positions practice (twenty minutes) --- 0.5 EXP
Work on headstand/handstand --- 1.0 EXP

Combination
Yoga workout --- 1.0 EXP
Learn full choreography --- 2.0 EXP
Master ten ninjutsu moves --- 2.0 EXP

Constitution

Stop depending on soda --- 5 EXP
Catch up on all doctor's visits --- 10 EXP
Get new contacts and glasses --- 20 EXP

Diet

Try a new fruit/veggie --- 0.5 EXP
Drink 64 oz of water daily for one week --- 1.0 EXP
Drink only water for one week --- 2.0 EXP
Don't drink soda for one week --- 1.0 EXP
Eat a good breakfast --- 0.5 EXP
Drink green tea every day for a week --- 1.0 EXP
Eat five different fruits/veggies in a day --- 1.0 EXP

Miscellaneous
Take my vitamins --- 0.5 EXP
Use floss and mouthwash every day for a week --- 0.5 EXP

Intelligence

Get 50 followers on Geektoria's Secret --- 5 EXP
Become fluent in French --- 20 XP
Learn to play a new instrument --- 20 EXP
Finish writing a novel --- 10 EXP

Learning

Practice French --- 0.5 EXP
Practice music --- 0.5 EXP
Learn a new skill --- 1.0 EXP

Culture
Read a book --- 2.0 EXP
Watch a new movie --- 0.5 EXP
See a live show or concert --- 1.0 EXP
Listen to a new band/artist --- 0.5 EXP
Visit a museum/zoo/aquarium --- 1.0 EXP

Creativity
Write a blog post that's original content --- 0.5 EXP
Do a puzzle of some kind --- 0.5 EXP
Create something tangible --- 1.0 EXP

Wisdom

Get out of debt --- 20 EXP
Make money as a writer --- 5 EXP

Common Sense

Make an emergency car kit --- 1.0 EXP
Write a will --- 2.0 EXP
Look into better insurance --- 1.0 EXP

Career
Submit writing to a publisher --- 1.0 EXP
Get 400 points at work in one month --- 2.0 EXP
Make commission at work --- 0.5 EXP

Finances
Pay off a credit card --- 2.0 EXP
Turn in a full change jar --- 1.0 EXP
Sell something I made --- 0.5 EXP
Save $1000 for emergency --- 2.0 EXP

Charisma

Start up a trans-youth donation organization in Grand Rapids --- 20 EXP
Be happy with my appearance --- 5 EXP
Finish my altar --- 5 EXP

Appearance

Get hair done professionally --- 1.0 EXP
Give self a facial --- 0.5 EXP
Dress up nicely every day for one week --- 0.5 EXP
Mani/Pedi --- 0.5 EXP

Social
Hang out with a friend(s) --- 0.5 EXP
Random act of kindness --- 1.0 EXP
Volunteer/Donate --- 2.0 EXP
Hang out with family --- 0.5 EXP

Radical Self-Love
People-free detox day --- 1.0 EXP
Tech-free detox day --- 2.0 EXP
Meditate --- 0.5 EXP
Write down five happy thoughts --- 0.5 EXP
Visit the lake --- 1.0 EXP